'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
