In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Randomize
