distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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