Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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