it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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