I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
