Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
