giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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