the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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