You can't special order awesome
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize