K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
