She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
My vagina is officially offended.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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