3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Randomize
