I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.