i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize