I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
