Fine. I'll sleep in my office
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
