Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
