Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
