i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
This is the high leading the old right now
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
