Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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