ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize