im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
there was a trapeze. enough said
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Randomize
