yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize