So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
