can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
