i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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