Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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