can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Randomize