I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
