woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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