The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
