is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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