Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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