if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?