I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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