We're like a lot better than the average bears
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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