Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
