I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
