You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
