her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
