Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
