we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
