And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
