Cold hands, warm shart.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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