Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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