So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
