I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
