I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
FUCK WHALES
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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