Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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