Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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